What’s Shakeyface, you ask? Well, we here at the Alamo have been indulging in Shakeyface for some time now…but for all of you unfamiliar with the more impressive abilities of the human body, let us explain: Shakeyface is simply the photographic documentation of violently whipping your head back and forth (or up and down for you daredevils) until it actually distorts your features into those of some unspeakable beast.
Sound difficult? It’s not! Just follow these easy steps:
- Have a friend face you with a digital camera. Shakeyface self-portraits are like self-surgery. No dice. Make sure your face stays centered in the frame and that camera’s flash is ON!
- This one’s the most critical: Let those cheeks of yours go limp and your lips go slack. Just make that face as loose and flabby as possible, like Droopy the cartoon dog. Like you just injected your entire head with novacaine. Yeah, there you go.
- When your friend the photographer counts to three, start brutally shaking your head back and forth in the fastest, most exaggerated “NO!” motion you can. Don’t wobble off…keep your head in the frame.
- Once you’ve reached fever pitch (usually just a couple seconds), take that photo! Hell, take a couple! If it didn’t work, try again until your mug looks like it just got possessed by a bathtub fulla war atrocities! If that happens, it means you’re a total gold medal Shakeyface success story.
The top two shakers from all the 2009 badgeholders will be invited to the stage at the Awards Ceremony on Monday, September 28 for a live slow-motion shake-off. Audience applause will decide the winner, and that lucky boy or girl will receive a gigantic blanket emblazoned with their own shakey face in frightening detail. The loser receives a giant headache.
Click on the video above for a montage of some of last year’s participants.
